A Moment of Clarity

One of my friends asked me if I felt like a mom yet, and I told her no. When I hear the word "Mom" I have visions of driving a van, arguing with my toddler in the store, knowing the lyrics to Hannah Montana songs, play-dates, trying to connect with my child by speaking jargon that's not hip anymore (probably the word hip isn't hip...) you get the idea.
I'm young! I'm cool! So I have a baby, that doesn't mean I'm a "mother"!!
Anyway, I'm going through the baby pictures and I came across the day in the hospital when I was under treatment for my pulmonary embolism/pneumonia and Melanie was in the NICU for low white blood cell count. I think we've been separated for two days by that point. The nurses from NICU were kind enough to bring Melanie to me for a very, very short visit before stealing her back away to NICU.
I was looking at those pictures of that short time I had with her and it all came back to me. The overjoyed craziness of seeing my little baby girl, my miserableness and helplessness of seeing both of us with IVs and the absolute grief and anger that swallowed me whole when they took her away. I remember crying huge tears of frustration and loss when they left.
And it hit me: I'm a mom. I feel like a mother now. Because I will do anything - ANYTHING to keep my daughter safe and happy. And if I can do that while keeping her forever with me, then I'll be the happiest mother in the world!
I'm a mother! We're mothers! But we aren't JUST mothers. We're friends, lovers, wives, girlfriends, workers, teachers, developers, cleaners, cooks, chefs, organizers, coordinators... you get the idea!
I scooped my sleeping baby into my arms and covered her in kisses. And the next time someone asks if I feel like a mother, I'm going to say, "Absolutely!"